Thought to share some of my thoughts with you all to make it special as promised.
I am a normal girl, raised in a mediocre city with usual Indian values and morals. Had a reasonably successful life in terms of career, marriage and social existence. Had common temptations ans fear. nothing extraordinary as my dear hubby believes.
During this unknown tempting and worrying journey which despite being virtual....has such huge impact in our overall way of life, our perception, the way we view this world, i want to first of all thank you all for being with me and keeping the basic sanctity which we requested in the begining. I have visited a few other threads..with more beautiful..and sensual ladies and your reactions towards the beauty. I appreciate your soft sensual responses with intermittent spices of a bit more cardinal ways of expression. Thanks
I want to use the opportunity to specially thank lone wolf, anil, monty, aakash, navel lover, poo, saint, satish, s69, rvdg, aries, summerboy and undoubtly just lust for your special support. i know you have not visited this thread as a mundane routine.
Have you ever wondered that how come we feel tempted to venture such slippery path by putting all that we have earn so far on stake...just for brief ecstasy...filled with both fun and guilt..
I am sure we all have different reasons. but i want to share mine.
we are a very happily married couple who have set example among our circles regarding successful marriage. my husband is the most caring friend, most dreaded guide, most reliable partner, best mentor and above all the person who loves me more than myself. he reads me like a book and without me saying, he knows what is going within me and what will comfort me. Not that he treats me like in fairy tales but in this real world, i could not have achieved this confidence ever, without him being my companion. confidence as a person, as a professional, confidence as a wife, sister, daughter and friend.
He made life too easy for me that i unconsciously drifted into such a comfortable tranquil state that i barely attempted to realize that as my sacred partner, he may expect more than delicious food, clean house, respect for his family and reasonable participation in our joint endeavor to live this life for a reason. That was sex. We had an amazing journey where as young adults we slowly, subtly explored the hidden pleasures of our physical being. he introduced me to so many emotions not anybody else ought to even attempt. We had our phase of unsaid chemistry evolving over the years.
Then, as time passed, I started being comfortable in fulfilling my responsibilities as professional, home maker and a daughter in law. I didn't even realized that i forgot something sacred but required...something raw, animalistic but unique to my relationship with him..which noone else dared to think of...sex.
If ilook back in yesteryears....i now see how my hubby tried many things to impress me. rather stimulate me. he surprised me with gifts, he impressed me with his social, professional success, he learnt to stay with me during shopping observing me spending money on things he didn't value, he started dressing well, continued to keep himself fit, ensured that we have quality time and above all keep mentoring on my progress as a person in all domains.
in regards to our physical intimacy, he loves to pamper me and treat me like a princess..not even queen..as i believe he never want me to lose the essence of a youthful princess in compared to aging queen. But as it stopped working he tried al he could think of....porn....raw....rough...soft....fantasies....holidays...list is never ending. However, now i realize how i used to force myself to just show my reciprocation to his initiatives, waiting for it to be over after he exhausts his emotions and efforts to tempt me to help him relive the joy we had in the begining.
In recent times, i observed him investing a lot of time on net. somewhat knowing that he is surfing the porn. but what better solution i had? it was a win win situation.
but now i feel i am lucky that despite my passive attitude and him having ll the opportunity in todays world to explore and cherish physical intimacy, he could never enjoy it alone. he continued to crave for my company.
Then, he told me about xossip. obviously, i dismissed it, frowned on him and even blamed him for having such ideas. but since he persisted, i got a bit carried away. not only that it was too arousing but because i strongly felt that i have to try to reignite the woman in me..in all her shades. and thus the journey started.
It was not a easy decision. we both could feel the hesitation but contained our apprehensions and fear from expression to give it a try. And i must say we both enjoyed this sensual and erotic stint.
This journey was a roller coaster ride. we wondered how will it impact us, our relation, our privacy. what if we get caught? what if someone identify us? what if we lose all that we cherish for these brief moments of ecstasy?
However, together we gathered the courage to experiment. and it succeeded. We both reinvented our closeness, the deep intimate longing for each other was being served. This was mixed with intermittent flavour of jealousy, guilt, moral dilemma and above all rationale for adopting such solution for our problem.
I still remember how odd it felt when we charged the camera and discussed the dress and location. I now adore his ability to comfort me. He tells me that he was worried what if people make dirty comments? how will he justify this venture. or, what if people do not respond? I may lose my confidence as a charming gal. and what if I get carried away? what will he do? anyway, when the first pic was postted, my heart was racing fast. my head heavy, a deep mix of curiosity, guilt and fear...as it continued we both started to get settled. discussed it with each other comfortably, shared our views about your views.
Time passed and visited few other threads. we both knew we cannot go that far as happens at xossip. slowly, we started to feel that we are not planning holidays, we are not discussing our offices, we rarely sat to have a cup of tea and look far in horizon inbibing the nature around us.
we may get up with tired and heavy eyes after spending hours in front of screen in dimly lit room, we could not give our best at office, we used to get a bit irritated in taking phone calls and hosting guests in the evening. As if we were getting sucked into this erotic, sensual but dark virtual world which we could not share with anyone except each other.
No doubt, we rekindled our personal life but at the end neither of us was comfortable including anyone in our private sanctuary. so, we revisited our plan.
when we started we had no idea how long and what extent we wana go. we had no idea how will it impact our relation as we can hide from the world but not from our psyche.
we decided to take a break and have some quality time. for few days we avoided even talking about it but......enjoyed mutual company both with mind and body. it was amazing to discuss from ISIS to trump, from kejri to Modi, from spring to summers, India with out current abode. and i will like to mention..migrating away from ur land looks lucrative but it is not as glittery as it appears despite enjoying the best amenities and earning well.
after the break we came back....undoubtedly enjoyed again..as much as before..but there was the comparison.
a brief erotic sensual addicting journey followed by heavy tired eyes, exhausted mind and constant feeling of guilt and fear
a deep seated affectionate love with my hubby along with adequate lustful intimacy as humans followed by fresh cheerful mind, rejuvenated body and endless opportunity to explore the different domains of our life..friens, family, work, leisure, nature, music, movies, politics, shopping, grooming and .........
The choice was simple. In no way, i am trying to portray myself as an ideal woman. Just sharing my mind after sharing my body for so many months.
The day is special...lone wolf, anil and aakash....because this is the last time i am interacting to my dear friends here at xossip. I have decided that this will be my last comment..rather story...here.
Time to say good bye to you all. I will always cherish the warm erotic journey which would not be possible without you all taking out time to be with me.
I tell myself that i need not worry about any fall out of this experiment (though we both always fear) as all the friends here at some point of time may have expereinced that fear of others knowing what they are upto. and after having this feelings, they will know that there is nothing to achieve by spoiling someone's life. this is a kinda request as well as we understand that internet is amazingly complicated for us to understand. we tried our best to keep the communication clean but who knows.
Though I wished that just lust may have had shared some more of his fantasies
If someone ever got hurt by any of my pics/words, please forgive me.
I wish that the new year brings a lot of joy and success to you all. Take care of your health and wealth. Love you all..
and please keep lusting for me. it is an awesome feeling to know that I kept so many handsome man at work...and will keep believing that i will continue to do so.
I have asked my hubby to share his thoughts too. i want him to know the experience the fun of interacting with friends who, despite being virtual, means a lot.
BYE BYE. Muaahhhh
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